Part Four – Using Forgiveness to Deal with Upset

This post is part four in a series on using forgiveness to deal with upset, or an “ego storm,” as many people who study A Course In Miracles call it.

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Who is Betsy Leighton?

I’m a writer, blogger, and healer dedicated to helping individuals reconnect with their innate peace and wholeness by healing nervous system dysregulation. My personal experience with chronic illness called Mast Cell Activation Syndrome (MCAS) shapes my work, and my content offers tools to empower those with chronic illness to improve their well-being and take charge of their health.

I created the Sacred Self-Healing Method and am a trained and certified Safe and Sound Protocol provider, an author, blogger, and A Course in Miracles Teacher. I hold a Master of Divinity in Spiritual Counseling and am a trained spiritual mentor, with certificates in sound healingaromatherapy, nutrition, and Sacred Deathcare. I offer a self-study certificate program in the Sacred Self-Healing Method, provide spiritual counseling and coaching, courses, and supported subscriptions for the Safe and Sound Protocol.

What is MCAS?

Mast Cell Activation Syndrome (MCAS) is a chronic condition that affects all organ systems. It can cause severe, disabling symptoms every day, including potentially fatal anaphylaxis.

The common triggers for MCAS are infections, toxic exposures including mold exposure and EMFs, trauma, concussions, and stress.

MCAS often occurs with other chronic conditions like Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (EDS) and Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (POTS). Managing MCAS is challenging because many healthcare providers are unaware of it, and diagnostic tests can be unreliable. Treatments include antihistamines and mast cell stabilizers in the form of medications and supplements, along with avoiding triggers. Check out this post on managing MCAS.

Losing sight of peace

Let’s say another driver in traffic just cut you off. Or, your toddler is throwing their twelfth tantrum this morning. Or, the good news you were expecting to see in your email box turns out to be the opposite. Or, you arrive at work only to realize that the meeting you spent days preparing for is cancelled. Or, your body is achy and sore from a chronic illness, and you want it to stop. Or, your partner just said something insensitive. The list of upsets you can experience on any day is endless. In any of these examples, you feel upset; when you are upset, you lose sight of peace. And when you lose your peace or get upset, you are in an ego storm.

What do I mean by “upset”?

The ego wants to keep you in a state of fear and of being emotionally triggered as much as possible, so it thrives on chaos. The ego wants you to wallow in negative emotions because that means it is alive. When your attention is centered on the ego, it is alive and thriving. The ego wants to be the only choice available for your mental state, keeping you continually searching for peace in other people, external circumstances, and material things. 

The ego is characterized by volume, drama, and excess. When you choose with the ego, you are awash in loud, intense feelings. You feel like you have to search outside yourself for a solution to your disquiet – for another person to be your soul mate to complete you, for the things that advertisers target your vulnerabilities to think you need to be whole – and that peace is not available to you without help. The ego knows that peace makes it disappear, and so it jumps into the void whenever it sees an opportunity to cause chaos, and thereby survive.

However, there is another choice for peace. The antidote to being stuck in an ego-storm is choosing with your right mind, which inherently means that you are whole just as you are. Your right mind connects you with peace instantly because with peace there is nothing to do or be, nothing to search for, and you yourself are perfectly loved by spirit just as you are.

What is an ego storm?

In A Course in Miracles, the term “ego storm” refers to a period of intense mental turbulence, fear, or upset that arises when you forget to choose forgiveness. It is the ego’s psychological “temper tantrum” in response to losing its grip on your mind. Whether or not you are a student of A Course in Miracles, or simply trying to get through your day, any setback can cause an ego storm.

The ego views forgiveness and love as an existential threat to its survival. When you choose to let go of a grievance, or the cause of your upset, the ego reacts by fighting back to maintain its perceived reality, resulting in sudden surges of anger, guilt, or fear.

Many ACIM practitioners refer to this state of being disconnected from the right mind as an “ego storm.” When you are in an ego storm, the ego becomes the default mode of your thinking. You are not consciously choosing with your right mind—instead, you are operating from the ego’s perspective. right mind is a choice for the ego. If your emotions are stuck in fear, and your thoughts are looking for where to place blame, your ego is in charge. It can happen in an instant, like when you get cut off in traffic by another driver, or when something triggers a past hurt, especially a hurt from the core limiting beliefs of your childhood.

Paradoxically, an ego storm often signals that you are making genuine spiritual progress. The temporary upheaval indicates that you are actively challenging the ego’s control over your mind and perception.

The Course teaches that the best way to navigate an ego storm is not to resist it, but to observe it without judgment, recognize it as a temporary illusion, and gently return your focus to the present peace of the Holy Spirit.

Intention

Sacred Self-Healing relies on intention and frequency. Intention directs frequency to bring about healing. The universal formula for healing is:

Intention + Frequency = Healing.

In this expression, “frequency” refers to the specific healing modality being applied. Setting an intention is particularly beneficial when utilizing self-healing methods such as frequency and forgiveness. This post covers more information on the power of intention.

Beneficial Frequency

Beneficial frequency refers to natural vibrations that synchronize biological and Earth systems, to support overall harmony. For instance, visible red and blue light from the sun are beneficial frequencies because they regulate circadian rhythms. Likewise, Earth’s Schumann resonance is a naturally occurring frequency that aligns internal and external rhythms for health. This post discusses beneficial frequency in more depth.

Forgiveness 

Forgiveness, like love, is seen as a high-frequency energetic state connected to compassion and gratitude. In contrast, emotions such as resentment and anger are thought to have lower frequencies, constricting rather than elevating well-being. Forgiveness helps elevate energy, promote emotional healing, and support physiological balance. Science hasn’t measured the frequency of forgiveness, but studies show that forgiveness can improve heart and brain patterns and help the body work more smoothly. Forgiveness brings balance, healing, and peace—both emotionally and physically. This post delves deeper into forgiveness.

How to get out of an ego storm

Here’s the fourth tool in this five-part series for getting out of an ego storm: Gratitude Recitation

Another method I sometimes use to get out of an ego storm is to do a gratitude recitation. A gratitude recitation is where you recite or list all of the things you are grateful for, and you can do it in writing, out loud, or in your head. I tend to talk to myself a lot while I’m driving, so that works well for me when I do a gratitude recitation.

Shifting to a mindset of gratitude is actually incompatible with maintaining an ego storm. It can be hard to start listing things you are grateful for, and at first, this practice can feel like stating the obvious. Of course, I’m grateful for air and water! But the purpose is to DO the practice because it shifts you out of an ego mind. So try to suspend your irritation about doing it, and just begin.

I start by listing the biggest things I’m grateful for, like my Inner Teachers, clean air to breathe, clean water to drink, a home for shelter, my car for transportation, my work, health insurance, etc. Then I move to the more specific things that I’m grateful for, like my husband, parents, and kids, the clothes I’m wearing, and meaningful interactions with friends. I continue to express my gratitude for everything and everyone I can think of, no matter how trivial. This tree, these clouds, the birds flying above me. This cookie. My body. My voice. 

Continue listing every possible thing you are grateful for until you begin to run out of things to name. By this point, you will have started the shift back to your right mind. If you notice that your mind leaps right back to the hurt you experienced or the grievance you have, begin naming things you are grateful for again.

Gratitude recitation can be a stand-alone practice to get out of an ego storm. But it can also be used with other tools for getting out of an ego storm. For instance, you can do a gratitude recitation until you run out of things to list, then shift to writing or talking to the Holy Spirit / your inner teacher. Or you can start with gratitude recitation, and then bring whatever is bothering you to the altar of truth for forgiveness.

The bucket theory

The bucket theory simplifies understanding symptom reactions with MCAS. Imagine your body as an empty bucket you don’t want to overflow. Reactions to various stimuli fill the histamine bucket at different rates, forming the total histamine level (how full your bucket is). More histamine means more symptoms. By managing triggers, reducing exposures, and taking medications and supplements, you can control your bucket’s level.

Know your typical symptom progression

Understanding your symptom progression during a flare is key to developing your rescue planThis post discusses how to recognize symptom progression so you can be prepared to address them.

Get my free ebook, symptom log, and meal plan!

Want a tool to easily track your symptoms?

Check out these circadian health tools!

I’m an affiliate with Bon Charge, a company that makes tools for circadian health, and you can receive 15% off your order with my coupon code BETSYL.

Bon Charge offers tools such as yellow– and red-tone blue-blocking glasses, red light therapy devices, PEMF mats, infrared saunas, and EMF-blocking products.

Sign up for the SSP!

I’ve found the Safe and Sound Protocol (SSP) to be the most helpful bottom-up healing strategy if your nervous system has been overloaded with toxic exposures, including mold or non-native EMFs, chronic infections, concussions, stress, or trauma. The SSP is a passive listening therapy that helps heal nervous system dysregulation. Many people with MCAS and other chronic conditions have nervous system dysregulation stemming from infections, toxic exposures, concussions, and trauma. The SSP is an easy-to-use app that lets you listen to specially filtered music for 30 minutes each day as part of a 5-hour cycle. Studies show the SSP has a profound effect on mental health and chronic conditions. Here’s a short podcast describing the Safe and Sound Protocol.

You can sign up for the SSP here!

Heal your mind!

While the SSP is a bottom-up, somatic therapy for healing the nervous system, the Sacred Self-Healing Method I offer is a top-down nervous system-healing modality that focuses on cognition, attention, perception, and emotion, using the mind’s higher functions. The SSP and the Sacred Self-Healing Method complement each other and together produce lasting results. Here’s a short podcast on my self-healing practice.

I provide one-on-one in-person and remote chronic illness and caregiver coaching, as well as Sacred Self-Healing Sessions based on the Sacred Self-Healing Method, a proven, novel co-creative healing modality detailed in my Books.

Order my books!

Here’s a short podcast highlighting my five books.

My latest book, Living In The Light: Healing with Forgiveness, Sound, and Light, is all about the tools that have been most helpful for me to heal: forgiveness, sound, through nervous system retraining using the Safe and Sound Protocol, and light, through entraining my circadian rhythm with the energy of the sun. Living In The Light is available here!

Rocks and Roots chronicles my solo backpacking journey on the Superior Hiking Trail and my efforts to overcome nervous system dysregulation, gut dysbiosis, and Mast Cell Activation Syndrome symptoms to complete the 328-mile hike successfully.

The Sacred Self-Healing Method ebook is available here and in most ebook retailers!

The Sacred Self-Healing Workbook is available for purchase here!

Betsy’s first book, Sacred Self-Healing: Finding Peace Through Forgiveness, is available here

Companion Recordings

The companion audio recordings of chants, guided meditations, and sound healing demonstrations that accompany the Sacred Self-Healing Method are available for free on my YouTube channel here

What do you think?

I’d love to have your reply below!

Disclaimer

The preceding material does not constitute medical advice. This information is for information purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, cure, or treatment.

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